


A Place To Lay My Head

by seraphina_snape



Category: Jurassic Park (Movies)
Genre: Community: smallfandomfest, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-16
Updated: 2010-12-16
Packaged: 2017-10-13 17:04:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/139600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seraphina_snape/pseuds/seraphina_snape
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Billy shares something with Alan. Alan takes a while to figure it out, but once he does, he reciprocates.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Place To Lay My Head

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the third [smallfandomfest](http://community.livejournal.com/smallfandomfest/). Originally published in July 2008.
> 
> Thanks to skinship for the beta.

Billy absently rubbed his right shoulder and wiped the sweat off his brow. He leaned back against the truck and cast an eye over the blue sky. Not a cloud in sight. With a sigh, he uncapped his bottle of water and took a long drink.

"Here you are, Billy!"

Billy turned around at the sound of Alan's voice and nodded in greeting, swallowing the last mouthful. He tossed the empty bottle onto the bed of the truck, where it landed with a hollow clank.

"Going somewhere?" Alan asked, eyeing the open truck door and Billy's backpack in the passenger seat.

"Yeah, I was gonna head over to Shark's Ridge," Billy said, waving a hand in the general direction. "I was gonna tell you before I left."

"No doubt," Alan said, leaning against the truck next to Billy.

For a few minutes they stood in silence together and Billy let his gaze sweep over the quiet land around them. Most of the small tents that had crowded the campground only days before were gone now, leaving only his tent and Alan's standing among the larger tents that held the equipment or stored the recovered artifacts before they were shipped off to Bozeman and from there to various labs all over the country.

Billy didn't know what he preferred: the quiet calmness that covered the dig site like a blanket in those weeks before the summer students arrived and after they'd left again, or the bustle of activity and the boisterous enthusiasm of those summer months when there could be up to sixty people at the site.

Billy looked at Alan out of the corner of his eye. "Wanna come with me?"

The offer was mostly pro forma. Not once in the four years that Billy had known him had Alan been to Shark's Ridge, no matter who invited him there. Alan was always too busy, too tired or just not interested, so it took Billy completely by surprise when Alan said, "Do I need to bring anything?"

Billy glanced at his backpack. He had everything they might need in case of an emergency. "Just a towel, I guess."

"Give me a minute, then," Alan said and headed for his tent, briefly clasping Billy's shoulder in passing.

 

~~~

 

While Billy steered the truck over the dirt road that crossed the valley, Alan spent the ride looking out the window. There was nothing to mark the road as such except for the groves in the ground made by the occasional vehicle that traveled this path.

Shark's Ridge, named for its most prominent rock formation that rose out of the ground like a shark's fin out of the ocean, loomed over them when Billy pulled off the road and parked the truck in the shadow of a cluster of rocks.

Alan waited for Billy to shoulder his backpack and then followed him through a narrow pathway in between two rock formations. They hiked in silence through the rocky terrain.

After a few hundred yards, Alan asked, "It's not far, is it?"

Billy pointed ahead to where the pathway ended in what looked like a solid, ten foot high wall of reddish rock. "We're almost there. Don't worry, no climbing necessary," he added, seeing Alan's skeptical look. "Somebody carved steps into the rock. Looks like it was made a few decades ago."

They reached the makeshift stairs and Alan let out an appreciative whistle. At first glance the steps looked like a natural formation rather than man-made. They were irregular and fitted into the natural shape of the rock.

"Wait till you see the other side," Billy said, climbing the steps with apparent ease. Alan followed more carefully, keeping closer to the wall.

Billy was waiting for him at the top of the stairs, grinning from ear to ear.

"Go ahead," Alan said. "You don't have to wait for me."

Billy's grin widened. "I want to see your face when you see this," he said, waving Alan on impatiently. "Come on."

Alan took the last few steps. What he saw made his breath catch in his throat.

[A small secluded valley, no larger than two football fields, spread out beneath them like an oasis. A stream of clear water rushed out of the rock on the western end of the valley, creating a glittering waterfall whose water caught in a natural pool below them before flowing out of the valley to the east. The pool as well as the waterfall were framed by a verdant green cover of vegetation like Alan hadn't seen in months. The few shrubs and wildflowers out on the valley plain had died weeks before after the last streams had dried out in the worst of the summer heat. ](http://www.flickr.com/photos/forgetmeknottphotography/255733026/)

"This place is amazing," Alan said, not knowing what to look at first.

Billy nodded, still grinning widely. "I told you, didn't I? How many times have I asked you to come with us?"

Alan half-shrugged, following Billy down the trail into the valley. "I didn't want to intrude."

"Intrude on what?"

"You know," Alan said vaguely. "I don't fit in with all those… _kids_. Not like you do."

Billy shook his head. "That's stupid, Alan. No one would have cared." He raised a hand. "You know what? That's not true. I would have cared. I wanted to share this with you," he said, spreading his arms to encompass their surroundings.

"Billy," Alan said with a sigh, "I didn't think it would be a great idea to tag along when the college students were out here to party."

They reached the edge of the pool and Billy let his backpack slide to the ground. He turned to Alan and rolled his eyes. "They didn't come here to get drunk and have sex, if that's what you're thinking. I might not be as old and grouchy as certain people, but I'm not an idiot. We're in the middle of nowhere here! What if one of them took a drunken header off the nearest rock?" He decisively shook his head. "No way am I letting a bunch of wannabes break two of the three most important rules on my watch."

Alan frowned. "There are three rules? I thought there were two important ones: no alcohol, no sex."

"No, there are three, although the last one is unofficial. I'm not sure who made it, but it's easily the most important one of the bunch."

"Well?" Alan inquired when Billy didn't seem inclined to share.

"Oh, it's 'don't piss off Dr Grant if you want to survive your six weeks of summer paleontology classes,'" Billy said with a smirk.

"Amateur comedians," Alan grumbled, hiding his smile under the rim of his hat.

When Alan looked up again, Billy's t-shirt hit him square in the face. He heard Billy yell, "Last one in the water is a rotten egg!", followed by a loud splash.

Seemed like he was the rotten egg.

 

~~~

 

Alan had forgotten to take his hat off before jumping into the water, a fact that seemed to provide endless amusement for Billy, who had rescued the hat from its watery grave underneath the waterfall.

The pool wasn't deeper than fifteen feet at most, and the water temperature was perfect – it was warmed up by the sun, but not to the point where it became too warm to be enjoyable. They stayed in the water for a long time, and Alan mostly watched Billy as he climbed the smaller rocks surrounding the pool only to jump back into the water with a cheerful whoop once he'd reached the top.

Alan, floating in the water with his hands folded behind his head, smiled at him from time to time but was otherwise lost in his thoughts.

Billy jumped into the water and instead of climbing out again, he turned onto his back and floated towards Alan, steering himself directly to Alan's side. "So I guess from now on you won't go and hide in your tent every time I mention coming to Shark's Ridge with me?"

"I guess I won't," Alan agreed, although he wasn't sure he wanted to come here with a gaggle of students in tow. This place was so peaceful and relaxing that bringing fifteen loud and adventurous college students here seemed almost sacrilegious. He was pretty sure that half of these kids wouldn't know a peaceful quiet if it hit them over the head.

"Hey, you can daydream later, Alan." Billy stood up and waved a hand in front of Alan's face. "There's this other thing that I wanted to show you before we dry off and head back."

Alan suppressed a sigh at the thought of heading back to the dig site. He loved his job, loved the times the dig wasn't crawling with inexperienced visitors or mostly bored students or amateur archaeologists who, after reading a few editions of National Geographic, thought they knew more about excavating a set of bones than he did.

"Well?" Billy asked. "Or do you need to rest first after all that strenuous floating around in the water, old man?"

"Old man," Alan snorted. "I'll show you old." In a flash, he'd set his feet on the ground and reached for Billy's shoulders, dunking his head underwater. Alan smirked when Billy emerged, gasping and spluttering, and as soon as he caught his breath, glaring at him.

"Ah, ah, ah," Alan said when Billy advanced on him with his arms poised to attack. "What did you want to show me?"

"I'll let you get away with it for now," Billy said. "But I'll remember this."

Alan grinned to himself and followed Billy to the waterfall at the far side of the pool. The water was at its deepest here and Alan and Billy had to tread water to stay at the surface.

"There's a grotto underneath these rocks," Billy said, slapping his hand against the cliff. "We have to dive to get to it, though; the access is underwater. It's not far, maybe six feet at most. And I brought a couple of glow sticks, so we'll have light."

"I think I can manage to hold my breath for a few feet," Alan said. "Get the glow sticks."

Billy nodded and crossed the pool with a few powerful strokes. He dug two neon green glow sticks out of his backpack and bent them, quickly returning to Alan's side.

"The rocks down there have a few sharp edges, so it's better if you drag yourself through the tunnel with your arms. If you try to swim, you might cut your legs and arms." Billy beamed at him and handed over one of the glow sticks. "Ready? Then take a deep breath."

Alan nodded, took a breath and dived after Billy. There wasn't much to see at first; the glow sticks cast an eerie green light over the narrow tunnel leading into the grotto, but as Billy had promised, it was very short.

When they emerged on the other side, the first thing Alan noticed was that the roaring of the waterfall had increased drastically. The grotto was small, forming an almost vertical corridor that ran the entire length up to the cliff's top. Very little natural light made it through the small crevices in the rock above them.

"Sorry, I should have warned you about the noise!" Billy said directly into Alan's ear. "Up there is where the creek flows along and breaks through the rock." He pointing to a ledge near the top of the cave where, on the other side of the wall, the waterfall emerged from the rocks.

"Come on," Billy said, his lips brushing against the shell of Alan's ear. He put an arm around Alan's middle and tugged him to a spot where they could exit the water. "The grotto is pretty cool, but it's not what I wanted to show you."

Alan gratefully climbed out of the water, shivering a little. The water inside the grotto was cool, almost cold as there was no direct sunlight to warm it up.

"It's this way," Billy said, nodding towards a dark passageway that led away from the grotto. "Watch your step, the ground is uneven."

They walked in silence for a few moments, both rubbing the goose-flesh on their arms to warm up a little. Then Billy started in on a story about some of the college students and their last day at the dig site. It seemed to Alan that college life had a lot more potential for drama these days than it did during his time. He'd never been more glad to have delegated most of his duties to Billy.

"What exactly did you want to show me?" Alan asked after they had been trekking through the damp tunnel for a while. At least there was only one path to follow, so the chances of them getting lost somewhere under the Badlands of Montana were pretty low.

"It's a surprise," Billy said. "It's not far any more."

Alan grunted in acknowledgement. He trusted Billy. He'd always trusted Billy. That was something Alan had realized with a flicker of surprise after the military had questioned him about the Isla Sorna incident. The routine questioning (Colonel Dunmore, the officer in charge of the rescue mission, had called it 'civilian de-briefing') had turned into a lecture on national security and How To Avoid Causing International Incidents With Countries We've Had Trouble With Before somewhere along the way.

They'd gotten off with a slap on the wrist for breaching an internationally acknowledged safety zone, and after signing fifteen different non-disclosure documents (in duplicate and in two languages, English and Spanish) they were sent home with a warning along the lines of 'If you ever need to be rescued from an island full of prehistoric creatures again, don't count on us to get you out.'

The Kirbys had been eager to return home to Oklahoma, but Billy had still been in the hospital on base, recovering from his various injuries, so Alan had delayed his departure to keep watch over his friend. One day, Colonel Dunmore had stopped by Billy's room and asked why Alan spent all his time watching a sleeping man. And not just any man but the one that nearly got them killed.

Alan had shrugged, not really able to put his feelings into words. At no point had he doubted Billy's loyalty or his dedication to their job. He'd been disappointed and angry after discovering Billy had stolen the eggs, yes, but it didn't make Billy responsible for everything that had happened on the island. Their mere presence there had been enough to put them in mortal danger. Sooner or later any one of the island's predators would have started hunting them. In a way Billy's actions might even have saved their lives: If another, less intelligent predator had had them cornered, they probably wouldn't have been able to buy the time to find a way out of the situation.

"Alan? You still there?" Billy had half-turned towards him. "I told you to watch your step. If you cut your feet, I'm not carrying you."

Alan waved him off and concentrated on the ground for a moment. The rock beneath his feet was rough, but not painfully so, and it was covered with a fine layer of red dust. He could feel a fresh breeze, indicating the there was an opening ahead somewhere. The light from the glow sticks formed a tight circle around them, making the darkness that surrounded them seem darker than it was. But if he strained his eyes, Alan thought he could detect a light somewhere ahead of them.

The path was ascending now, the air getting warmer, and Alan found himself looking straight at Billy's back as they walked. Most of the smaller scars had faded to a soft, barely visible pink color. But the most prominent ones, the claw marks around his right shoulder and the slashes on his shoulder blades were still clearly visible. They seemed almost black in the green light of the glow sticks, but Alan knew that they were a healthy pink color. It always made him slightly nauseous to look at them and imagine how Billy must have suffered for those hours he'd spent floating along the river and lying torn and bleeding at the shore.

"Another hundred feet or so and we won't need these," Billy said, waving his glow stick, "any more."

As Billy had predicted, the glow sticks became obsolete when the tunnel opened into a narrow slot canyon. The sun was too low to fall directly into the canyon, but there was enough light to let the smooth rocks on either side of them gleam in a warm, dusky sepia color.

"No need to carry those around when we don't need them," Billy said, taking Alan's glow stick and putting both of them on a narrow ledge at waist height. "We can collect them on the way back."

The canyon was wide enough to let them walk side by side, although they bumped shoulders from time to time when the path narrowed a little. Billy assured him again that it wasn't far any more. And just as he'd promised, a little bit along the way the path took a sharp right turn and ended, opening onto a small ledge that overlooked the valley below. The view was fantastic, even though they were only 40 feet up from the valley, 50 at most.

Alan took a careful step onto the ledge and looked up, seeing the two rocks that formed the slot canyon stretch up at least 150 feet above their heads. "Where are we?"

Billy grinned. "Guess."

Alan looked around again. They'd been walking for maybe ten minutes, and if he'd judged the direction in which they'd been going correctly, their truck should be parked somewhere east of them around the side of the rock formation. "Well, somewhere on Shark's Ridge, I'd guess. Somewhere facing away from that little oasis."

"Yep," Billy said, carefully approaching the ledge's outer edge. He sat down, letting his legs dangle over the edge and leaning back until he could stare at the sky. He twisted his head a little to look at Alan. "I don't know if this ledge has a name, but the canyon's called Snake Canyon."

Alarmed, Alan cast his eyes around the ground. Snakes weren't dinosaurs, but he'd had enough contact with reptiles to last several lifetimes.

Billy laughed. "Don't worry. I've never seen a snake up here."

Grumbling, Alan sat down next to Billy and looked out across the valley. It was a great spot for a romantic rendezvous, Alan supposed, or it could have been, if the canyon hadn't been so hard to access. It would take an especially adventurous couple to try and spend the night here. Alan smiled wistfully. He imagined Billy to be the adventurous type, always eager to try something new. He couldn't say if Billy had spent the night somewhere other than his tent recently, but Alan simply knew that if anyone could find a way to arrange a romantic dinner on this very ledge, it would be Billy.

"It's beautiful out here, Billy," Alan finally said, getting back to his feet. "The students must love it."

Billy sat up. "We should head back."

Alan frowned at the abrupt change in Billy's demeanor. "What's wrong?" He reached out and touched Billy's shoulder.

"It's nothing," Billy said, stepping away from the ledge and away from Alan. "Nothing is wrong."

Alan didn't need Ellie's social competence to figure out that Billy sounded oddly subdued all of a sudden and that his smile was so fake it had to hurt his teeth. Alan reached out his hand and put it on Billy's chest to stop him from leaving. "Okay, even I can figure out that something is wrong."

Billy sighed. "It's nothing," he repeated. "Just…"

"Just what, Billy?" Alan asked quietly. He could feel Billy's heartbeat fluttering against the palm of his hand.

"I come here to be alone," Billy said, face turned to look out across the plain. "I've never brought anyone here before."

"Oh."

"It's just--this is a special place for me." He glanced at Alan, flushing slightly before turning his head away again. "I guess after I got you to come to the creek pool with me, I just wanted you too see this, too."

Neither of them moved. Alan kept his hand on Billy's chest and Billy continued to stare into the valley but he didn't step back from Alan's touch again.

"Thanks, Billy. I'm, uh, I'm glad you showed me this. It's a beautiful place."

"Yes, it is," Billy agreed. He sighed and took a step back. "But we really need to leave now. The glow sticks are gonna be good for another 40 minutes or so. I don't know about you, but I don't want to traipse around a cave in total darkness. Come on."

The trek back to the grotto was made in silence, but this time it was Billy who was lost in thought, not Alan, who again found himself studying the scars on Billy's back. When they emerged in the pool outside the grotto, Billy immediately headed for the shore. They dried off and got dressed quickly, both still feeling the coldness of the cool grotto water.  
Then Billy wordlessly handed him his hat and shouldered his backpack and Alan started to think that maybe he'd missed some sort of clue after all, something in their earlier conversation that would give him a hint as to why Billy wouldn't even look at him directly for more than a second.

The hike back to the truck was made in silence, as was the ride back to the dig site. Alan went over the afternoon in his head, but he couldn't figure out what had caused Billy's cheery, playful mood to drop. The sun was setting when they arrived back at the site and Billy excused himself and disappeared into his tent.

Alan took a walk around the dig site. He found a few abandoned tools lying on the outer parts of the area, no doubt left there by bored summer students who came to the dig mainly to get the required academic credits for whatever subject they were studying. He should start taking a security deposit for tools the next season. After all, somebody obviously left his brushes, his flashlight and his rock pick lying around the dig site, and who's to say a person like that wouldn't be as careless with the more expensive equipment?

When Alan returned to the tents, carrying several chisels, hammers, brushes and flashlights, the light was already out in Billy's tent. Alan thought about having a drink in the trailer, but dismissed the idea. He wouldn't have enjoyed the drink and his solitude as much as he used to.

 

~~~

 

"Oh, _Alan_ ," Ellie said when he told her the story over the phone a couple of days later.

"Now, see there? What does that even mean?" Alan asked. He was standing in a claustrophobically small booth at the only pay phone in the back of the only bar in town. The music was sometimes a little too loud for his taste, but it was a good mixture of country and rock classics, and J.D. Sullivan, the bar's owner – also known as Catfish due to his enormous moustache – always had a pot of the best homemade chili within a hundred miles on the stove. It was also one of the few places that didn't have a working AC unit, so Alan had the phone in one hand and his hat in the other, fanning himself with it.

"It means that men are clueless and you especially," Ellie said, clucking her tongue.

"What? Clueless about what?"

On the day after their visit to Shark's Ridge, Billy had been acting no different than usual. He had greeted Alan way too cheerfully in the morning and smiled when Alan had grumbled and hidden his face behind his extra large cup of strong coffee. They'd worked in companionable silence all day, finally getting some real work done now that they didn't have to keep an eye out for inexperienced students and overly enthusiastic amateurs. In the evening, they'd taken the truck into town and had a beer and some chili.

Alan had quickly forgotten about Billy's strange behavior, but Ellie had asked after Billy like she had every time since the Isla Sorna debacle and he'd told her the story before he'd thought about what he was doing.

"Oh, Alan," Ellie repeated. "Billy took you to his special place, his favorite spot, and what did you do? First you accuse him of bringing every hussy up there to impress her enough to get into her pants, and then you don't even acknowledge the fact that he took you – you, Alan – there to share something important of himself with you."

"I what? I never said any of these things! Accuse him of bringing every hussy-- how did you get this from what I told you? I did not say that!"

Ellie made a small noise of disagreement, but didn't actually say anything.

Alan sighed. "Okay, I give up. You win. It was exactly like you said, now will you please tell me how to make it right again?"

"Alan, if you don't understand the problem, how can I help you?"

Alan rolled his eyes. "I might be confused, but I'm not stupid. You think I played down the importance of Billy's favorite 'alone' spot and now he's hurt and wondering why he even showed me the place."

"No, Alan. I think that's what _Billy_ thinks." Ellie took a deep breath. " _I_ think that you're completely in love with that boy and were secretly thrilled to be let into a place that Billy hadn't shared with anybody else."

"Huh," Alan said.

"And if you could finally sort out your own feelings and get over your hang-ups about the age difference and the fact that you're both men, you might realize that Billy feels the same way about you."

"Huh?" Alan said again.

" _Yes_ ," Ellie said empathically. "It's almost painful to watch you two circle around each other every time I see you."

"Uh, Ellie?" Alan said, clutching his hat tightly in his fingers. "Someone's waiting to use the phone, so I have to go. But, uh, I'll think about what you've said."

"Liar," Ellie retorted. "But all right. Talk to you next month."

"Yeah," he feebly agreed, holding the receiver until the dialing tone got too much to bear.

 

~~~

 

About a week after his talk with Ellie, Alan was in the final stages of The Plan.

He'd had food – real food, including dessert – delivered after making sure that Billy was safely on the other side of the dig site and set up the trailer for dinner. They mostly used the trailer as an office, although there was a bed that Alan could have – theoretically – used while they were on site. He usually preferred the tent; it made him feel closer to the rest of crew and the dig site itself, like the canvas of the tent was less of a barrier between himself and his lifelong passion than the cold, hard metal of the trailer. But tonight, he'd cleared away most of the paperwork and put fresh sheets on the bed in the back of the trailer. A bit presumptuous, maybe, but he'd been a Boy Scout in his youth. He liked to be prepared.

Alan had covered the old built-in chipboard table with a white tablecloth, found two actual porcelain plates to use instead of the paper plates they had for the dig site and scared up two glasses, just in case. He didn't think they'd use them, since he'd bought a six pack of Billy's favorite beer. Wine was for people at fancy restaurants where they served the food in portions so small that you had to order at least five courses for twenty-five bucks each in order to get something in your stomach.

"Alan?" came Billy's voice from outside.

"In the trailer!" he shouted, quickly uncovering the tray of food. The aroma of baked potatoes intensified, and Alan smiled.

The door flew open.

"Hey, Alan, I--" Billy broke off when he saw the interior of the trailer. "Oh, wow. You got a date or something?"

"Or something," Alan said, herding Billy into the trailer and towards his chair. "Sit down."

Billy sat, too startled to protest.

"Beer?" Alan asked, holding out a bottle.

Billy reflexively took the bottle. "Hey, that's my fav-- Okay, what's going on, Alan?"

"Nothing's going on," Alan said. "We're having dinner."

"Dinner?" Billy raised his eyebrows and scratched his head. "Yesterday, dinner was a piece of bread and two fish grilled over the fire." He paused. "Did I forget your birthday? Did I forget _my_ birthday?"

"Your birthday's in March, Billy."

"Right." He watched Alan for a moment, then shook his head. "You're freaking me out here."

"No need," Alan replied. "It's all very simple. I just thought I should share something special with you as well. But I can't afford to fly us to my favorite spot, so dinner it is."

"You-you wanted to--" Billy broke off and made a helpless hand gesture. "I mean, thank you for dinner, Alan. Looks fantastic."

"Billy."

Their eyes met across the table and Alan smiled. "Yeah, I wanted to, uh," he said, repeating Billy's gesture.

They smiled at each other over the table. Billy's smile was almost bashful, but the heated glint in his eyes belied the shy smile and the flushed cheeks. Alan grinned. Maybe he'd been right to strip the bed and put on some fresh sheets. Contrary to Ellie's assumption, Alan did not have "hang-ups" about being intimate with a man. He'd been with both men and women, but that wasn't a fact he usually shared with his lovers. Maybe the times had changed by now, but Alan had made the mistake of confessing his bisexuality once – and only once – and he'd moved on with the realization that a surprising number of people were fine with alternative lifestyles unless you didn't stick to the one gender of your assumed preference.

Looking at Billy, Alan decided that it hardly mattered now. He started a story about his undergrad days that involved a squirrel, two crates of crushed ice and one very freaked out guest-lecturing archaeology professor. Billy retaliated with one of his own, supposedly more spectacular, stories and conversation over dinner mostly consisted of sharing amusing anecdotes and reminiscing about shared events.

When the steaks and potatoes and half of the beer were gone, Billy pushed his plate away and made a content noise in the back of his throat. "I had fun, Alan. Thank you for this."

Alan raised an eyebrow. "You don't need to sound so surprised. I've been known to have fun on occasion," he said. "And besides, don't thank me yet, dinner isn't over." He pulled two bowls out of the small refrigerator. "We've got dessert."

Billy groaned, rubbing his stomach, but he eagerly accepted the bowl Alan handed him.

"Banana split?" Billy asked when he saw what the dessert was. Laughing, he said, "Wow, Alan, you don't do subtle very well, do you?"

Alan rubbed the back of his neck with a sheepish expression on his face. "Yeah… well," he said, "sometimes the direct approach is the best."

 

~~~

 

Billy ate his Banana Split with cheerful abandon. He licked chocolate off his fingers and whipped cream out of the corner of his mouth. He turned his attention to Alan every so often and licked his lips, his eyes glowing with mischief, and offered him a piece of strawberry or banana.

Alan picked absently at his own dessert. He hardly noticed the taste of his ice cream as he watched Billy eat his. While Billy had finished his dessert, Alan's had turned into a pinkish grey sludge, topped with a few strawberries. Alan didn't care.

They cleared the table in silence, Alan putting the plates into the sink to soak in hot water and Billy stuffing the garbage into the trashcan. Then Billy sidled up to Alan and handed him their unused glasses, their sides brushing against each other.

Billy looked at Alan and smiled. "The dessert was great."

"Dessert?" Alan scoffed. "That wasn't dessert, that was foreplay."

"I'm glad to hear you say that," Billy said. He took a step towards Alan, pushed him back against the counter and kissed him.

Alan groaned, giving Billy the chance to slip his tongue past Alan's lips. Billy tasted strongly of banana and strawberries, and Alan decided that he'd never eat these particular two fruits in public again. His reaction was bound to be indecent, if his rapidly filling cock was any indication.

Billy clenched his hands in the fabric of Alan's shirt and pulled it out of the waistband of his pants, sneaking his hands underneath the hem.

Alan arched his back when Billy brushed her fingers over one of his nipples. He felt feverish, wondering if it was his long abstinence or the fact that this was Billy in his arms that made everything feel so good, so much better than he remembered. Then Billy licked along Alan's neck and he decided that he didn't care. He slid his hands down Billy's back and to his ass, squeezing a little.

Billy groaned, shuddering in Alan's arms, and Alan could feel Billy's erection rubbing against his hip. "Bed," he murmured against Billy's cheek, reluctantly letting go of him. But before Alan could release his hold, Billy turned in his arms and pressed his ass into Alan's groin. Alan looped his arms around Billy and pressed a kiss on the back of Billy's neck.

"Bed," Billy reminded him after a moment, tugging Alan towards the other end of the trailer. Alan, his arms still around Billy, used the time it took them to walk the few feet to unbutton Billy's jeans and pull down the fly.

"You're wearing too many clothes," Alan accused when Billy gave him an amused look. He tugged at the fabric of Billy's t-shirt.

"If I'm wearing too many clothes, then so are you," Billy said.

Alan toed off his boots and socks and shrugged out of his shirt. "Better?"

"Mmm, much." Billy pulled off his own shirt and kicked his sneakers into the nearest corner. He spread his arms. "Better?"

Alan laughed. "Mmm, much," he said predictably, making a show of appreciating Billy's naked chest. He reached out and hooked his fingers into the waistband of Billy's jeans. "Come here." Alan took a step back, stumbling slightly when his legs hit the foot end of the bed, and sat down heavily on the edge. He pulled Billy into his arms, hands splayed on his spine as he mouthed first one nipple, then the other.

Billy moaned, his hands gripping Alan's shoulders tightly. Alan dragged his tongue over the raised flesh and smiled to himself when Billy let out another moan.

"Want to touch you," Billy said, pushing against Alan's shoulders. Alan fell backwards, hitting the bed with a quiet " _oof_." Immediately, Billy reached for Alan's pants and dragged them down and over his ankles. He shoved his own pants down and kicked them off.

Alan, smirking slightly, reached up and took Billy's hand. He gave it a short but powerful tug and Billy was sprawled on top of him.

"That's how it's gonna be, huh? Fine with me," Billy said, winking, "but I gotta warn you, Alan: I fight dirty."

With that, Billy put his right hand on Alan's shoulder, pushed Alan flat onto his back and straddled his hips, effectively pinning him to the bed as well as creating delicious friction in their groins if either of them moved. With his other hand, he tweaked Alan's nipples, grinning when Alan gasped and writhed against him.

"Billy," Alan said, still gasping for breath. "Billy, I-- _God_ \--I'd love to keep playing this game the whole night, but I'm way too close to the edge. If you want to get to the main event any time soon, you gotta stop doing that." He paused. "Unless you're not up to that?"

"Is that a challenge, Alan?"

"No," Alan said, suddenly serious. "Just letting you know that we don't have to do anything that you don't want."

"That's almost sweet," Billy said, leaning down to kiss Alan's abused nipples. "But you know that I'm an adult, right? I've been 'up to' this stuff ever since I was fifteen and discovered how good it felt."

"Well, in that case," Alan said, running his hands over Billy's arms, "there's lube and condoms in the top drawer."

Billy laughed but crawled across the bed to get the items out of the drawer. He tossed the lube to Alan and took a condom out of the box, putting it within easy reach of Alan. When he looked back at Alan over his shoulder, Alan was fumbling with the clasp of the tube of lubricant.

"Alan." Billy waited until Alan looked up, then wriggled his ass a little. "I want you inside of me." The cap of the tube sprung open with a loud snap. Billy smiled, and waited as Alan squirted a healthy dollop of lube into one hand and recapped the tube with the other. He tossed the lube back to Billy, who put it back into the still open drawer.

Alan knelt behind Billy and slid a hand over Billy's backside, running a slick finger along the crack. Billy moaned, resting his head onto his crossed forearms. Alan took the chance to explore Billy's body a little more. He spread Billy's ass cheeks and rubbed his thumb in circles around the hole, spreading the lube on his fingers in and around Billy's asshole.

"God, Alan, stop teasing me," Billy pleaded, pushing his ass back so that it bumped against Alan's groin. Alan wiped his fingers on the bed sheet and took the condom out of the wrapper, rolling it over his erection. He positioned himself behind Billy and slowly pushed in, trusting that Billy would stop him if he needed more preparation.

Billy drew in a sharp breath and Alan stilled, putting his hands on Billy's hips. "Okay?" Alan asked.

Billy exhaled slowly. "Give me a moment," he said, wriggling slightly. The movement made Alan groan and he bent forward, letting his forehead fall onto Billy's back. He kissed the first bit of skin he could reach and, feeling the slightly raised flesh of one of Billy's scars under his lips, froze.

"Alan? What's wrong?" Billy asked.

"Nothing."

"It's my scars, isn't it?" Billy said, sounding resigned. "I guess it's not a pretty sight."

"It's not that," Alan said, keeping a hold of Billy when Billy made to pull away. "I don't care that you have scars, Billy. I have quite a few myself. It just hit me again that I could have lost you on that damned island. Could have lost you without having had this."

Billy flushed. Alan didn't know if it was a blush of pleasure or of shame about how he'd acquired his scars. Either way, Alan didn't want Billy to have any doubts about himself or their relationship.

He deliberately ran his tongue along the biggest of Billy's scars and started to rock his hips slightly, slowly increasing the speed of his thrusts when he felt Billy relax. Alan trailed one hand along Billy's spine, loving the way Billy moaned and arched into the touch. He kissed the back of Billy's neck and reached his right hand around to circle Billy's erection. It fit into his palm perfectly, and Alan lost himself in the rhythm of pumping and squeezing Billy's cock in time with his thrusts.

Billy muttered "oh, fuck" and pushed back against Alan, shaking slightly as he came with a loud groan.

Alan gasped as Billy's muscles clenched around him. He grabbed Billy's hips and pushed forward, coming after only a handful of thrusts.

Alan loved this, loved the feeling of being so connected, so close to Billy. But he could feel his cock softening, so he reluctantly reached for the condom and pulled away from Billy. Billy made a small sound of displeasure and turned to his back, looking up at Alan with heavy-lidded eyes. "How come we haven't done this before now?" he asked.

Alan shrugged. "Beats me," he said, pressing a quick kiss to Billy's lips. "Be right back."

He was about to pull away when Billy put a hand onto the back of his neck and dragged Alan back down, bringing their lips together for a passionate kiss. "And that," Billy said, pulling away a little, "is how you should kiss me when you're going somewhere."

"Even when I'm just going to get a washcloth?" Alan asked, raising his eyebrows.

Billy nodded, his lips brushing against Alan's cheek. "Always," he said.

Alan could feel his throat close up. This wasn't Billy finding an excuse for kissing him or being a little silly after a spectacular orgasm. Their eyes met, and Alan nodded slightly, watching the smile spread over Billy's face.

 _Always_ , Billy had said. He could do that, Alan mused. He could do always.

Alan swallowed hard, his voice slightly scratchy when he asked, "Even when we have company and I'm just heading for the bathroom?"

Billy's smile transformed into a smirk. "Especially when we have company," he said with a wink.

Alan laughed and headed for the kitchenette and, after throwing out the condom, found a washcloth in one of the cupboards. He cleaned himself up and then brought the wet washcloth to Billy who wiped himself off before chucking the washcloth back toward the sink. He missed, but neither moved off the bed to get the wet cloth off the carpet.

"Just one more thing," Billy said, making himself comfortable next to Alan.

Alan dropped a kiss on Billy's shoulder and asked, "What's that?"

Billy turned his head towards Alan and waggled his eyebrows. "Next time, you're wearing the hat."

End.

**Author's Note:**

> The small valley/oasis was inspired by Brian Knott's Arizona and Utah [landscape photography](http://www.forgetmeknottphotography.com/gallery/), specifically the Havasu Falls picture linked in the story.


End file.
